The Possibility of Vulnerability: A poem by Joshua Hope

How can I know if it's real?

I'll tell you.

Frozen snapshots of reality,

Etched into the walls of my mind.

A reality that whispers,

So distant,

So near, 

As if from another galaxy,

All the while, standing right here,

A reality that whispers in a shout,

'Not until they realize.

Erecting stone fortresses,

Buttresses of my happiness. 

Withholding happiness for sake

of an ersatz righteousness.

In my drive for holiness,

I have forgotten my humanness. 

My humanity, a forgotten, distant

Element of my existence.

I know it's real.

I know it's real because of the 

Lengths I go to keep the need 

Forgotten and distant.

Until it is realized,

I will keep this wall strong.

When they realize, they will realize 

the type of help I need.

The key to my heart, they whisper.

Vulnerability. 

A whisper secretly cries,

'Rescue me. I am so alone.'

Rescue me. If only they knew. 

What happened.

If only I had have told long ago, 

The entire world would have rescued me.

Vulnerability,

My heart's plea. 

I desire to be free.

This fortress overtakes me.

I don't know where to begin.

Or how to navigate this endless sea, 

Without a compass, 

Navigating an endless eternity. 

Then, suddenly,

This eternity, endless sea of time

Lights up as a supernova. 

Possibility.

Remnants of creation, 

Peering back, back in time

To the most eternal galaxy.

You step in.

You take my hand.

You show me how to take a step towards being free.

You open my heart to the possibility of vulnerability.

Yet, whispering, in your love, I cry,

'How can I know if it's real?

Without community?

Without human love guiding me?

Making the love you have for me

True.'

You smile. 

And you say to me,

'Wait and see!'

Open your heart to the possibility of vulnerability.

I will take care of the rest.

Open your heart to the possibility of being free.