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Thursday, September 28, 2023

Phileo By Jonathan

I only ask you, who knew that getting to know someone new could have been so delightful? What a cherish-able delight that I find in you. It's true that not everybody is as special to get to know as you. I have only known you for a matter of days but already, you are like my best friend. Probably more even than some of my best friends. I think that already, we know each other more intimately. Is this where love begins? A point where two friends can say I am thinking about you all day. It's true for my part, I'll say. At the thought of you, friend, my first desire is to write poetry. You have such charity in your heart. Caritas. Do you know what it means? It is deep. How much greater is one's beauty when they possess God? Well, I wanted you to know that I see so much of God in you. I admire your sincere and gentle faith and unwavering devotion to God. I see YHWH in you. I really started to care for you. If only I knew, is this what people mean when they say they are in love? It feels familiar yet so distant. What a beautiful and precious thrill. I see Jehovah in you. All my past, I have avoided risks. It hurt so much to be rejected. All of that feels forgotten because I had the courage to give a note to you. I see now the reason for poetry. It is love. Love that were as though between children. Pure, united in purity and simplicity. Love that makes the heart sing, issuing forth rhyme and lyric as though they were honey. What a thrill to get to know someone. An ever greater thrill when they take the interest to get to know you as well. My heart is aflame. Talking to you, waiting for your next message is like praying the rosary. Every moment, like an eternity with a completely melted heart and in love entirely. A growing, phileal love is kindling for me to you. You surprised me the first time I saw you. You enkindled within me a desire to love. To reach out. To love again, at least. The way you looked at me made me feel desirable. It was like you desired to know my soul. This feeling is sweet like a wine. You are so precious. It is your faith that got me. I cannot sleep, you are on my mind all of the time. It is a lovely sleeplessness. I am fully content waking for the day at 1AM because you are with me. If even only in my thoughts. I see God in you. I see God in your heart. I have to tell someone just how I feel. Is it wrong, these emotions I feel? When is the last time I felt this feeling? This connection is divine. How can love ever be forbidden? Surely, God desires us to be glad and to spread our love. What is wrong with emotional intimacy? What is wrong with phileo? Surely, it is a beautiful thing. I have learned to care for you. And I see YHWH in you. I feel the presence of God in you. My heart softens like melted wax. I love hearing you speak. Your words are sweet. Your words are sweet because your what is in your heart is sweet. I know my life is better with you in it. When I see you, I am so incredibly inspired. I do my best creative work after spending time with you. Even an hour with you. It's like you wake me up from a deep sleep. Knowing you, I am striving for more. I wonder at you, Shemesh, my friend. I don't usually do that: in having the courage to speak to women. There is something very special about you. The very depths, the heart of you. In the reason my angel asked me to speak to you. I know I see God in you. I know that God sees something very special about you too. And I know there is a reason you were sent into my life. It makes me incredibly glad. I can't even say the last time I felt this way. My heart pauses. Your heart has arrested me. This feeling, overbearing. I wonder at you. Not many friends enter a friendship with so little reserve and so little hesitancy. I wonder what it is that you see in me that inspires you. I want you to know that I cherish our friendship. And I am learning to really love you. I wanted you to know that you have challenged me. It's part of why I love you. My faith is strengthened when I am around you. And I see your genuine care for my soul and that you desire me to be free. That time will come. And indeed, I know it will be you to help me. I know that God sent you into my life. And I cannot wait to see how our friendship unfolds. I only ask, will you accompany me on this journey? On this journey of phileo? I wanted you to know that I see YHWH within you. And when the Scripture says, 'Become like a little child in your faith and in your love for others', it's like this verse is speaking about you, only you. Because within you, it is so incredibly true. Whatever I have done to have merited your concern and care, I thank God. I am so thankful for you. To know you. To be friends with you. Will you accompany me on this journey of phileo? I can't wait to see how our friendship unfolds. 

4 comments:

  1. My heart skipped a beat when I first saw this title! Phileo. Who could have known this word would take on so much meaning to me, now that I’ve met you. As my eyes raced through your poem, my heart was pounding word by word while you poured out your heart to me. Your precious, pure heart of glass. I phileo you my friend forever:-)
    Thank you Natchun, for the most beautiful gift anyone could ever receive. I’ll treasure it, always.

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  2. I don't know if you will get this comment since you commented anonymously. But I wanted you to know I got it and your words moved me as much as this little poem moved you. You're my hero! And I am so glad it made you happy. Phileo you XOXO!

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  3. I told you, I’d check periodically. Glad I did today :-)
    🫶🏻

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    1. Haha, that last comment was from me! Glad you check broski! ❤️

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