May 12, 2016:

Today is a nice day. There was a point today where I was thinking to myself again how traumatic my life has been. Really, with a sound mind, I have been through a lot more than most people have. But on that thought, Christ has been through more than me. There is no sense in comparing yourself to others; your pain to others’ pain. It just makes sense after a while to rejoice in your pain. I received the Spirit last Saturday after confessing on my heart what I have done. I repented and then asked one of the elders at my church to pray for me as well. His name is George. He’s truly a great man, filled with so much love. I have been praying for him and his family (he has a couple of boys) for a several weeks. It’s refreshing to see the work of God in action. At service there was a God at Work video after Communion. It was about Kyle. Jack’s son. In it, he was talking about the fact that there was a point where he was addicted to drugs and held up a convenience store. His parents had the police come to their house and had him get help. This was clearly a plan laid on Jack’s heart by the Spirit because after some jail time, Kyle was saved and is very faithful. I saw him as I was greeting that day. I didn’t recognize him but did when the video came on. His smile is filled with such love. It’s so encouraging to see how God can use the repentant heart. This morning, I received a package from Susanne, a woman to whom I sent a painting I had created. When she asked me if she could pay me for it, I told her to paint something for me. So she sent me a beautiful little humble painting of a lighthouse. This is very valuable to me. I will treasure it with my heart. I want people to know that regardless of how bleak it looks and feels for me now, regardless of how dark my life gets, I will never give up. I will keep faith through whatever darkness comes my way. It’s nice to know a few people believe me.